what happened???

so i don't talk about my older sister alot, just because we are not as close as we use to be when we were kids. we pretty much grew up, and went our separate ways. I remember when we were younger we would always do everything together. if she would go to our nanny and papa's house i'd be right by her side. I wanted to do everything like she did, saying she was older than me and i looked up to her. Well when we were in our teenage years i remember one day she was moving out of our house and going to live with my nanny and papa. At the time I didn't understand why she had to leave, but when I got older I knew it was because my papa had become very very sick, and she was going to go live with nanny to help take care of them. Well she went to live in Anderson with them and started going to Anderson county schools. Well she gradually stopped coming here on the weekends to visit us, and then stopped coming completely. I would go over and stay with her and nanny on occasion but I never really liked going to hang out with the people she would hang out with. They all smoked and drank and stuff and were older than me. I didn't think it was cool, but i wanted to have that relationship with my sister, so if hanging out with her friends is what it was going to take to be able to hang out with her, thats what i was going to do. I remember one time. she got me to lie to nanny for we could go to the lake and hang out with this guy that she liked. I'll be honest i felt bad for lying but it was fun going to the lake and out on the boat. Well her friend came along too and she liked this other guy that was going to be there also, so I was kinda the third wheel in this whole situation which wasn't fun. . . but i was getting to hang out with my big sister and that was all that mattered. . . .well to make a long story short. . . . my sister missed my 16th birthday which is a very important milestone in a teenagers life, . , and about a month later I found out I was going to be an aunt. . . . well I was excited that I was gong to be an aunt, but still upset with my sister that she missed my 16th birthday!. . . . .so my nephew was born, and ever since he has been born its been a battle on us getting to see him. See her boyfriend doesn't really like us all that much, and so yeah he pretty much doesn't let us see my nephew. . . Well now she is going to have another baby and its going to be a little girl,. . and i would do anything to be able to hold my little niece close and tell her how much I love her, and that I will always be there for her. . . but I don't know if I will ever get that opportunity with how things are looking right now. . . I had a chance to talk to my aunt on Friday before I came home, (because my niece is suppose to be born this weekend) but my aunt informed me that the only people she wanted at the hospital was her boyfriends family. . . . Its crazy, you would think she would want her family to be there. . .but thats wrong. . .All i can do is pray that God will change my sisters attitude about the whole situation because He can do that!! And I have faith that He will. . . . So that is what is on my mind right now, and I couldn't concentrate on writing my paper because my mind kept going off and thinking about my little niece who hasn't been born, and all I want is to be able to hold her close, and tell her how much I love her. . . and now that I got that out. . . maybe now I will be able to write my paper for my final exam! .. . until next time

~KHB